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03:00 

Up'n'down

Today was one of the most productive days in my whole term.
At the moment I feel 100% that I'm doing everything perfectly the right way, just how it needs to be done. Such a rare feeling)))
And this is good cause yesterday or the day before yesterday I just didn't know what to do - not one thought) Guess, now is the biggest challenge of my term. I've developed so much during last several days - thnx to my team.
Today I made one of the awesomest LCMs. I was talking about the emotional intelligence competency and its importance in times of emotional breakdown and demotivation. You know, the psychology stuff - self-awareness and taking the control over your own emotions. That was a big challenge for me at the beginning myself cause I am so emotional. Not now though. One developes such a nut shell during his LCP XP. Now I can control my feelings pretty good. No, not feelings, of course) Just emotions.
The other interesting issue was the qn about where should you stay - on the neutral side or positive... I looked through some materials and they say that you have to be balanced out to see all the effects - both positive and negative. But is it like that in ordinary life and is it the same in AIESEC. Guess I stick to the point of view that it is still better to stay more optimistic in real life but to be closer to the middle in AIESEC - to foresee the problems and to be ready to solve them. Interesting stuff.
Think of making list of the books which made big impact on my mind and mindset.
Just totally happy. With everything.
This is the positive momentum right now. And yesterday there was the negative.
Gosh, I wonder how much the stuff we believe in affects our life. It would be sad if all the things I discover for myself work just because I believe they work))))
So, yeah, need to get the momentum back and get balanced out.
Another interesting thought - but is it worth it? I love feeling strong emotions. They are sometimes the only thing I know 100% is real. But if I will always be balanced out, will life try to swing me back and forth again and again? Another thought to think about)
No definitely, you get proofs of the stuff you believe in - just cause you notice only those proofs, I guess.
Weird, though I didn't get enough time to sleep last night, and I feel very tired now, it feels like being exactly the "popcorn machine" - Dey's expression) Thoughts just pop up in my head every second.
Anyways, tomorrow is 2,2 yrs. Ready to enjoy the moment) Need to make sure its really 2,2 yrs)))))))))))) Bad with dates)))) Last time didn't remember any of the birthdays of my family exactly. What a shame - and I consider myself being a good person.
Going to sleep. Wanted to read first - didn't open a book for several days now - with a lot of stuff going on around. Too bad. The book has some interesting material to think about. I think, I gonna start quoting things I really like. It's name is "Blink" btw, by Malcolm Gladwell. Worth of reading. Some interesting points about relationships btw ppl which can be applied to many things beside all that 'true love' topic. And about other weird unconscious mechanisms running in ppl's heads and being unexplainable.
Hear it? Pop, pop, pop....
Need to calm down and go restore my sleeping cycle.
Overachiever. Proud to be LCP. Motivated. Trying to reach emotional balance now)
Next things to talk about on LCMs - capitalizing on weaknesses and social enterprise. Looking forward to elections)
________kisses__________

@музыка: 3:21Maroon 5 feat. Christina Aguilera - Moves Like Jagger

03:58 

Break

Today was the first day of studies. Surprisingly it went easier than I thought it would.
And today I've been elected the Reception Coordinator. It was almost official though our LCP is still in Malaysia. Honestly, I don't understand why they all wanted to do the elections so fast. I didn't know about the day until last minute. So I actually didn't write out the speech properly. Too bad. Another OCP candidate had it perfect. Though that doesn't matter - we were applying for different projects. The thing is that I was the only candidate for my project so this all is like a joke - all the elections))) Another good thing about that is that VP OGX will send me an EP to match and in some time I'll be a full member))) Cool))
Had a fight with a Boss. Confused with all the people still( All of them want something different))
So today I decided to celebrate my new position and made a special dinner. That was such a mess))))
I'm going to slow down with this diary. I am actually not that kind of person to write everything you think in a diary every single day. That is really tiring(( I just wanted to try it that way first. From now on I'll write only in case I have some very strong feelings about something. Or just when I would want to say smth out loud. I'm thinking about removing the address of it from my page. But we'll see. Now I really don't have anything to write about. No, I actually always have something to talk about, it's just nothing special. So... a little bit of rest during the break))

@музыка: discobitch_-_cest_beau_la_bourgeoisie

@настроение: goood)))

03:05 

Back here!

And trying to be an overachiever!
And some people are too strange to even be worth of any attempt to understand!
And didn't get a word from u!(
And gonna stay up all night!
And was almost excellent today!
And need a new plan!

20:23 

Yay!!!!

OMG!!! I finally did it!!!!!!!!

@музыка: Bar de Aux - LSD

@настроение: ♪ Я люблю LSD, лазеры, секс и девочек♪

23:29 

Blue Nostalgia

Saw Allie on the Facebook... Looked through her friends... went to Myspace... Is it good to make such programs like FLEX? You live in different country for a year, you try to adapt, you try to make friends, you try to be them, to blend in and after that you are just leaving without knowing of ever coming back... What about ties made with such an effort? What about those who liked everything there better? I had a friend whose family environment was not so good, she went to America with me, she could never stop spilling tears on the way back, she couldn't talk to anyone. All because smn was nice to her, nicer than her Mom... I'm sure she meant nothing for them. It's almost always like that. Even me...I didn't try to make heartbreaking ties there, but I got to know so many ppl... Known or not they left their trace in my life, during that challenging year. I am going to America, but to the North and just to compare. It's going to be a bit later. But I still wasn't going to see them, I wouldn't be able to even if I wanted. They all are graduates now, probably all around America. And though most of them weren't my friends, I didn't like that place enough to want to come back and settle, I still somehow feel like I miss them all... One of them more than all others. Which still doesn't make any difference. Several skeletons in the dark corner of my heart... So why does it hurt so bad if they didn't mean much to me??

@музыка: Город 312 - Обернись

@настроение: sad

02:26 

Pure emotions.

Гордость - Не опоздала на пары (!!!)
Удача - Городков А. М. - лучший!! Market research half done!!)) Yay!!
Провал - Предстоящий зачёт у "Мужчины Всеобщей Мечты"
Радость - Море Суши, Общение с Нормальными людьми))))
Айсек - Мануал по мэтчингу
В первый раз - Сыр Камамбер до тошноты
Адреналин - Поездка с Катей(много мата)))
Приятно - Починка DVD-ROMа
Грусть - Ты далеко(((((
Самореализация - Петь!
Комфорт - Чай с лимоном.

День удался))))

А ещё - есть добро в мире: спасибо Катюше, Артёму, Анатолию Михайловичу, тем, кто спас ребят в Москве.

И всё же - "она просто привыкла. привыкла... к жизни в этом мире. она уже не обращает внимания на глупые насмешки за спиной, упреки, предательства, бесконечную ложь. она просто привыкла..." - про меня. А надо больше прощать людей и верить в них сильнее.

Продолжаю жить под девизами: "Constantly improve!" и "You can!"

@музыка: Bar de Aux

@настроение: mixed

14:50 

Итоги 2010 года!

2010 год...
Много было хорошего и плохого...
Выбрана ТМом в Айсеке, неудачное начало работы ЕВ, Plan-it, полгода как медовый месяц, одна привезла 5х стажёров в лагерь, качественный набор, потеря Артёма, отпустила Антона, клёвый корпорэйт, НатКо, решение, планы на ближайшие 3 года, успешный конец года,overachiever...
Неприятные моменты были, приятных ещё больше....
Одно не изменилось: люблю тебя, скучаю по тебе, хотела бы, чтобы ты был сейчас рядом, поэтому немножко грустно...
И так будет ещё где-то 3 года....

Но! Всё хорошо! Всё получится!
С Новым годом!
lossofsoul.com/info/2011.htm

@музыка: Oona - Tore My Heart

@настроение: =)

01:42 

Trying to become...

So... LCP elect...
Different attitude of ppl, high expectations, wild mood swings, all kind of plans in my head, fake speeches and constant critical analyzing of everything around, and constant feeling stressed, and constant tries to fit in the image and situation.
That's what it is - to be an LCP elect.
But I know the only thing - I don't want to be spoiled by power. I need smth to balance me out....
Well, no one said it will be easy...

Anyways I'm strong enough for almost anything, I'll manage)

17:12 

Hate!

Hate ppl who are acting right in my face!
Hate ppl who think only about themselves!
Hate ppl who are covering up their real motives and reasons behind some lies aimed at making others feel guilty or uncomfortable.

My team is going to be a team no matter what. Real team. Enjoying the participation. And everyone would be able to kill for joining it!

05:43 

EuroCo'11

So, I hate the end of the conferences(((
I get to know people who really are amazing, and I just can't let them go...
And I hate saying "Good bye"... And I hate sugar cubes...
And the moment of leaving was soooo long((
You know, it's better to go away without ever turning back. Cause if I meet anyone in the future - than it has to be like that. If not - why look into yr past? Why ever look back? It won't make the moment of leaving easy.
Yeah, the conference really made me think at almost every side of my life. I met very different people. And each of them gave me smth small or big to learn and think about. Loved it.
And all the psycology "fluffy" stuff too))))))))))
Enjoyed every single moment from the first day till the end.
Decided on what to do next with my life. Solved several challenges. Looked at the world. Learned a lot for myself.
LCP stuff kinda.

Now start thinking of all the changes to make in my LC.

@музыка: 2Raumwohnung - Play

@настроение: tired

20:50 

Berlin

Always wanted to go to Deutschland) Never knew why. Was scared to go not to be disappointed...

Now I'm in Berlin in the hostel. Just returned from the city and going to a pub in an hour. Alone. You know, there is some special feeling about travelling alone - you see a lot. You don't need to follow other person's wishes on where to go and what to visit... A lot of time for thinking... I feel like I start thinking too much))

So, anyways, Berlin, Germany... Just fell in love with it... Don't know why - weird feeling - like I've always lived here. Everything looks so familiar and close to heart... I definitely love travelling))

Started using this word too much... Self - convincing... lol

Tomorrow some more of Berlin and way home) A bit tired - plus a lot of stuff to do at home: uni tasks, chairing at the @IS, LC managing... Challenges & challenges...
Againg trying to balance out personal life and @.

Plans, thoughts, goals.
Being an overachiever again and again. Developing and getting stronger with every single minute at every sphere of my life.
Just AIESEC.

01:14 

Huge breakdown

Life goes in circles.
Especially in AIESEC Kaliningrad.
Totally crashed down.
Need to be strong.

05:44 

Messed up

Mom is gone. House is empty without her. And I feel kind of lonely though my Best friend is sitting next to me with a beer and shrimp)))
Today there was a lot, no, like A LOT of work for @. And some @ers are so self confident. They like to push a lot without any proper reason but they don't do their work properly. Gosh. I'm tired of all of them. I really would like to go somewhere to different LC and find out how things are going there.
And our studies start tomorrow, wait, no, today. That sucks. Don't want to go there.Still have to turn in an essay.
I feel kind of totally messed up right now. Have you ever had this feeling that you have to be somewhere else, not here, like you don't belong to your nowadays life. The feeling when all people around you seem to be uninteresting strangers of no use for you. I sometimes do feel like that. And it seems that when I will have independent life I'll be so far from here that everything appears so stupid and useless. I know this is only one of the states of my mood. I wish I could control such periods and stay cheerful and funny as usual but sometimes stupid people just drive me crazy. There are so many of them((
And I still don't have any news from americans and something is definitely going on there. But no one tells about it me(( Still worried.
Well, I've been very usefull today so I'd better go to bed. Tomorrow there will be different day and that also means different mood)) That easy))

@музыка: silence

@настроение: tired

00:27 

Mission complete!!

Well. Yes, we did it. Woohoo!!!!! It's quite risky, I should say, jumping with a paraсhute. There was 3-hour training and our instructor was very scary. He was from airborne military people. He was huge, bald and aggressive. But he seemed very funny in the end of the day)) We all became like a family)) So, yeah, there might be so many dangerous situations in the sky when you have to act in a special way and without any panic... Trying to remember all the information and being quite nervous we had to wait until sportsmen made their jumps. And that was cool, cause they had all the height and paraсhutes you could control. But new people get just simple automatic parachutes you can't control and only (!!!!) 600 meters of height. So the jump lasts for only about 1 minute. And first half of it you are trying to check the paraсhute above you - if it is fine, and the second half of it you are thinking about landing))) I didn't have time to look around properly(( Another thing was that I didn't have time to get scared neither when I had to jump out of the plane, nor during the flight down. But it still is like a great deed, like I've overcome something else)) So, yeah, I'm going to jump at least 2 more times. First of all, I'm not going to think about anything but beauty around me next time, secondly, when you jump 3 times - you are considered to be a paraсhuter. And after all it's still very exciting. And next summer I'll go bungee - jumping))
Yesterday I was shocked by the fact that my Mom is leaving actually tomorrow and not on Wednesday, so soon.
Tomorrow I had to go to work but smth happened and I am actually quite worried. Though americans have to be still on their way. Or not. May be they got lost... Goodness, what if something happened to a child, not to them.... Allright. Stop. Everything is going to be fine. Totally fine. Let's wait until I know about everything.
Stupid @ work. I've spent all the day just looking at the pictures on the net for our poster. I'm going to become perfect designer))) Photoshop designer)))
I got one more idea of one more tattoe. Now I'm 100% sure that with that number of tattoe' ideas I'll manage to do at least 1 this year)))
And the worst news is that we are starting our studies on Wednesday(( I was hoping that may be I'll have this week off or smth. But no. They also make me mad with their schedule. I'd rather had 1 full day of courses than 4 days with 1 course a day. So stupid. All the week is wasted. Well, I'm sure I'll find couple of ways to have fun)
And that virtual man appeared to be full of crap. As I was afraid of. Oh God. And I can do nothing for her((( I would give away my life for her if it could help((( That's, by the way, how I measure love. There are only 2 people I would give away my life for. That's how I love them. You just have to ask yourself: "Do you love that person enough to be ready to die for him?" And that's it...

@музыка: Avril Lavigne - When You're Gone

@настроение: ok

03:47 

Power of our thoughts.

Have you ever seen the movie "Secret"? I have recently. It is about the psychology of people's thoughts. Our fears are much stronger than other feelings we experience. People tend to think about their problems more often than about anything else. I heard of the theory which says that man's thought always becomes material. Well, that means that everything we think of comes true. Is it right? There is a "law of meanness" as we call it, when something you are afraid of or just don't want to happen actually happens. Whether it is true or not, person has to think positively anyways. It is much easier to live thinking about good things than about bad. In the movie they said that if we think about things we want, it will all come true no matter how big our wishes were. Probably it won't happen the same second but still... There is a hope! And they also said that we have to visualize every our dream and try to feel happiness and joy as if we were really experiencing that. Now that is hard. People are so happy to remember the feeling distinctively very seldom. What if you are in a bad mood?! I'm not able to make myself joyfull trying to visualize something when I actually feel sad. This is another question. The question how to make yourself feel good. Music.... When I am sad, I tend to listen to sad music. That is so wrong. But most of my favorite songs are not about joy. Probably because usually people like songs which are close to their soul and thoughts. And what do people think about most of the times? Right, their problems. That's like some kind of magic circle! So, yes, good music... Movies usually affect me and my thoughts a lot... Those "stupid" chick flicks... All that love and tears and happy moments and happy ends make me feel happy for somebody. What else can raise my mood? Oh, yes. The Memories. There certainly were several moments in our life when we can say we were happy. Many people think there weren't. May be we don't want to rememember some because we understand that we can't return it or because of some particular person. But happy memories certainly can make us feel good. And another thing I really love can make me high. The Nature. Mother Nature. Even in the city. Even when it's rainy and mud is everywhere. You can still look at the sky and see the beauty of unexplainable wonderfull world. I try to be happy for others: my friends, my enemies, even those I don't know and will never meet again, just strangers. One of my friends recently said that he thinks it is usual programm. When you tell someone that it works and he believes you and it really starts working for him. Like some useless pills- you give them to a very ill person, hopelessly ill, and tell him it will help. So he believes the pills will cure him and it really happens. Not because the pills were a miracle, just the power of human thought-he ACTUALLY BELIEVED it. So may be there is the solution. We have to convince ourselves and that will be it. If we will believe in something it will work for us. If we will think that if we visualize something we want, it will come true, it will work for us. Just as long as we believe this. Kind of hard to understand. Let's think of predictionists. When we come to them they tell us what will happen in our life in some time. And we BELIEVE them. We believe it will happen. So it just happens. So simple. Man's mind is very powerfull thing. Everything will be like we want it to be if we actually believe it. Everything is unstable and a lot is unexperienced and unexplained yet! Mankind has a very good potential!

14:54 

So funny to read your own previous entries)) After all the theories I heard and all the literature I read, movie "Secret" is just crap))) That means progress in my development)) Yesterday I had very strange feelings. But that was evening and no one was around so I will just forget it. Seriously, if you believe in your destiny and more than that - you believe that your world is constantly taking care of you, then you have nothing to worry about)) Everything will be fine)) My life will be, no, wait, IS perfect)) It is so funny - to convince myself)) But anyways, there are a lot of goals set and they need to be achieved. I want finally to jump with a parachute))) And then in some period of time I want to go bungee-jumping)) And I have couple good ideas about my tattoo)) And some other stuff to do)) And, yeah, of course, a lot of AIESEC work to do))) Including getting ready for my OCP position)) I'm so inspired!!!)) Thanks to one Very Special Person)))

@настроение: positive

22:08 

Girls like tests))))))

No, seriously, girls love tests)))) It was so interesting to count their results after I published some at Vkontakte. And the things are (if to believe the tests) that mostly girls are after money and look for a partner who is independent, handsome and at the same time who doesn't use those features)))) Yeah, and all of them want him to be so unapproachable and honourable and privileged. And, of course, he can't let any girl but special her near himself. Jesus, if I was a guy I would already be a hero))))) It is so easy to behave like that and that's it. Nothing else needed. No pick up things, nothing. Or you just need to be charismatic and charmingly polite and funny. Which is much harder, cause either you have it or not. Then girls will just sleep with you for an idea of your personality. As it was at our Summeet with some people. And I was shocked. Seriously. Maybe I'm too conservative. But I didn't think @ers would strive for such excellence trying to act so sustainably and enjoying participation that much by drinking and having sex.I don't know. I'm just glad I quit drinking and smoking. That makes me a little bit different. At least concerning my power of will. Or whatever you call it. Today I even heard this theory that @ers work hard in between all the conferences but when they get to the conference.... They make it up to the life of usual teens. If you say it politely))))) No, never gonna be it. And another thing is that I won't avoid meeting some people from Summeet. People I'd rather wouldn't meet. Well, we'll see. I'll really try to be nice, I swear)) The other thing which is bothering me is this Recruitment... So much work and so much trouble. And I have so much free time that I can't make myself do it.Unfortunately a lot of nesessary people are leaving(( It will be short absenсe but I feel like I have no inspiration any more. And no brilliant people around me. No example. I'm slowly realizing that all work is going so much better at other LCs. And the thing is that our LC is not a team. And previous LCP and EB had it all so differently organized((((( And I don't know anything about how things went earlier and what we are doing for our development now. And what is worst I try not to think whose fault it is. But we have to grow. I think I will be very useful for my own LC next conference. Seriously!

22:51 

One lost day...

That was one awful day(( The reason is my computer. I have no idea what my Mom had done to it but Opera just refused to work. Error, error, error, error... Hate this word(( And from the very morning till around five in the evening my Boss ( ^_^ ) and me tried to figure it out. The day has been completely lost((( No, seriously, none of good browsers now work on my computer. Neither Opera nor Firefox. That's a thing about computers: even if you think you know at least smth about them, they like to prove the opposite. Unfortunately, I'm so not a programmer. Or may be it's good - I can be freaky enough))) Anyways, my computer is going wild these days. And it drives me completely crazy. Another thing is about children. They grow sooooo fast!! I've been tutoring the boy since like February, may be. So he left for his summer break. And then he returned.... He is almost taller then me!! And he is only in his 8 grade of Middle school!! And, of course, he changed a lot. And that is funny to notice. He really tries to behave and talk like an adult)) Tries to be serious))) Tries to really think about English - not like it was in February)) And wants to be a Cook))))) Seriously, World needs such men these days)))) And it's only 2 months I haven't seen him!) Though I still can tell by his blank expression on the face when I have to shut up with my explanations ))) And the other thing I noticed - he can't do two things at the same time)) As most part of men))) He can write OR he can listen)) when I start telling smth while he is writing - he stops)) It's so funny, especially when I'm just repeating my last sentences))) Last night went out to movies. There is the only and last movie theatre in the city I sometimes visit. The car movie theatre. Yesterday my Best friend and me decided to make an agreement, to compromise. The horror movie and a chick flick. I wasn't very fond of any of them. And neither was he. But we made it look like I watch the horror one though I hate them and he watches the chick flick)) The one with Lindsay Lohan, A little pregnant. And the horror - The Mist. As I expected - both are trash. Though I thought both would be even worse)) Doesn't matter, we just had a good time))) I like that movie theatre. It's unique, you have to go there at night, which supposes driving around the night city, which I love to do, and also I love the cafe there. Their fast food cousine))) I guess that's the only place in the city where you can get ANY fast food without waiting in a long queue. No, I'm totally not going to be a vegetarian or even close to that any nearest time))) I'm way too in fast food and sweets))) Tomorrow, I hope I'll manage to start on-line promo and @ presentations. Unfortunately, I have to be at home and the weather is sooo good(( Well, that's ok, I have my friend's Bday coming and the bye-bye party too. Will have to visit both) Untill then - "just working"...

@настроение: undefined

23:25 

Too much chocolate, too little time ;)

Today I ate a box of chocolate all alone!!!!!! And I have no idea why!!!!! I've always been sugarholic but never that much)))))
And I'm such a good girl!!! I've done half of on-line promo today!!!!))) Yey))) Though I couldn't concentrate on doing it half of day too(( Kept thinking about some particular people... That just sucks(((
Nevertheless, I've got a second Daddy today XDDDD I granted this position to my Boss))) And he's got some privileges now))) Now he can call me some special name, my VIP name)))))) OMG, I had so much fun and so much work today)))
And tomorrow there going to be a party where I can communicate with people!!! Like real people!! Cause I've been sitting at home in front of the computer for several days already and that's too much for an extravert!
And there is a lesson with my pupil too. I have to find smth for him to translate. And last time we talked about it he asked me to find Twilight or Spider man)))))))))) Twilight))))))))) After he called this name out loud I just tried to hold on and not to laugh))) and he was saying smth about that he's not like really into this story but wouldn't mind reading it or smth for at least 10 minutes))))) soooo funny))) He's so cute. ))) Have no idea how I will print smth out, but I'll try to find it at least))) So is it really true that guys don't like the Twilight story? Or they just pretend specially for girls? ))))) I'll have to figure it out)))) Though even my Best friend once told me he hates it and even if HE told me this I guess it will be hard to find out the truth))) But the thought that guys actually might like the Twilight story despite all their words makes me laugh)))
And there was another small but very promising event today!!!)) Probably, that is why I'm so high now)))))) But I won't tell anyone!!!)))))) Not to spoil anything!!!!)))))))Seriously!!!!!)))

@настроение: happy))))))

00:03 

Overunderemotional... Or the other way around??

Two days break....
Now I'm sitting here... tired... a bit sad... thinking about you... Wtf? What is going on? How is it going to look like? What am I doing to myself? Do I need it? Do YOU need it? Yes, I got the point. What do YOU think about all this and whom do YOU need to think about you? cold... frozen... but ready to get started... and nothing from you... and not sure if there will be something or even is something... pain...or not...unsure... wtf... Can I forget you right away? Maybe, yes. Do I want it? Maybe, no.
That's what's going on inside of me(( and that's how it usually is after several emotional events. I'm just drained)) Need to insert next CD))
So, events...
First, the bye-bye party. It was pretty cool. There were a lot of people, mostly alumni. Which is good. Though I didn't quite got the results I wanted to get from this party... But I don't regret at all. One thing I get to 100% is that @LC has to be and feel like one team to act sustainable)) Right, I memorized at least couple of values)) That's good)) Anyways, all my ideas got approved and that's it, well, that's good too, cause now I know my ideas are not so stupid altogether))) It's just I am not really satisfied with them by myself. Yeah, I was talking about the party... Can't get myself to like all those drinking games... I don't know... Totally not Bitches-bitches' person... Need to make up some good nick...Well, I hope it'll come later. The only thing I didn't like at the party were some of the alumni. Like, there are some people who, if they know more at some area (or they think they know more), start acting like they are the smartest ones, the stars, and everyone else need to listen to them and just obey. Hate such people! Any good manager will tell that this is such a mistake. That's why during the Summeet, people were afraid to come to CC team though guys were working only for them. Well, that's were only some particular people and some alumni were quite normal and adequate)) The behavior can already tell you about a person and his personality and state of his mind)) So that would be enough for the party. Except that, unfortunately, my friends who were not @ers didn't fit)) Yeah, and it happened that I brought 2 non@ people to this party)))) That was funny)) As I said, unfortunately, no results... Well, at least I gave my Best friend some new emotions. And that is good)) The most funny part was when at 3 in the morning I remembered that I have my work that very day at 10.00 I was quite shocked I forgot it so I had to hurry and go home. Unfortunately. I got only 4 hours to sleep. So good I don't drink or I guess they would just fire me))
Yes, so, second, my work. The thing I'm starting to get is that I love my job. No, seriously, I love my job!!! I guess I will give up my manager's profession and just be an interpreter))) Seriously, you are going around in a good car with good people and doing only one thing - talking! New people, new emotions - fully enjoying it))) I just have to learn second language))) I want German!! And then, to go to Germany!!!!! Though it's second popular language and it might be not that usefull... still! Gosh, I have so much to do in my life!!! So many opportunities)) And during today I almost found out how to make good barbecue)) And I'm learning so much about children))) And where we have places with children's clothes, toys, strollers and other stuff)) And everything is so cute!)) As my xbf said, maternal instinct awakes at 20 yrs old))) Another thing is that everything is quite expensive and the child will grow out of these things like in 3 yrs... So where do you put all this then?? It would be completely useless(( and still cute)))
Third thing is that I was eating and eating all second part of the day!! I gained like 3 or even 4 kgs(( And tomorrow I have my friend's Bday!! And this means more eating))) That's awfull(( I have to stop!)) While I was writing all this my mood went up a bit))) Still, these days were quite fun)) Oh, and there still are those games with someone I'd rather not have it with((( He's older and smarter, but I feel all that kind of stuff, all his traps(( Just don't like it. Though I'll still try to be very nice to him, he'd already heard enough from me. Men have their pride no matter what, and you can't touch this part of them no matter what. Well, I can perfectly understand that.)) Another thing about these days was that all my old friends suddenly decided to call me)) But I've changed so much and all of them were like, OMG and Wtf?? Well, that's the way I am)) I can't guarantee you anything about myself, everything can change in one second))

@музыка: С. Тайх - Больно

@настроение: unsure...

Дневник __Tequila__

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